Like many parents, Liang May and Meyer Yang faced a burning question when they had to enrol their seven-year-old son Ewan in primary school last year. Which is the best school for Ewan?
For Meyer, 38, the choice seemed obvious to enroll Ewan to his alma mater, Anglo-Chinese School (ACS). It was also good because Ewan could gain priority admission into ACS since his father is an old-boy.
But May, 37, had other thoughts and considerations.
One, she preferred a co-ed school, so that their five-year-old daughter Faye could attend the same school as her brother in future. This would mean less logistical issues in the future.
“If school dismissal happens at the same, I can’t possibly go to two locations to pick them up,” said May. “If they are in the same school, it is also good for sibling bonding.”
Second, location is a crucial factor.
“Sending them to schools further away would mean that they have to wake up much earlier. The journey can take up to an hour. They may end up getting much less rest and feel burnt out,” May noted. “This is not ideal for the child.”
Also, May wanted a socially diverse environment for her children. “I want to raise my kids to be able to communicate and empathise with everybody and, most importantly, to respect everyone for who he or she is,” May explained.
Meyer was convinced by May’s reasons. And to the surprise of many, the couple made the decision and opted to put Ewan in a neighbourhood school.
Friends and family members thought May and Meyer were foolish to give up the chance to enroll their son in a brand-name school like ACS.
“My friends told us, ‘Siao ah!’” May recalled with a laugh.
However, May and Meyer had a different take on what makes a good school. A good school isn’t in the brand. A good school is whatever school a child can thrive in on his own pace.
This decision has been proving to be a wise choice so far.
Going to school takes Ewan only 12 minutes by public bus, or about five minutes by car. He is enjoying school, and has made friends from different walks of life.
May and Meyer are both happy with the culture of the school and have better time outside school hours doing meaningful activities with the family.
Prioritising family time
In many ways, May and Meyer are mavericks in their parenting styles. For instance, they do not send their kids for academic enrichment classes.
“I don’t think my kids would be happy if I send them for abacus or extra Chinese classes,” said May. “But they would be happy to go play with us on the weekends. Kids naturally gravitate towards play. I believe time in school is enough.”
She also shared this perspective with readers of her blog, which she started in 2013 to document her parenting journey.
Today, while she does not track traffic to her blog, she said many who read it find solace because she shares the “positives and negatives” of her parenting approach.
“I’m not seeking for people to agree with me on my parenting style and decisions, but just sharing how I do it. Every family works differently and I share what works for us,” she said.
But her story about choosing a neighbourhood school over a brand-name one for her son remains one of her most impactful posts.
“We do not have to listen to popular opinion or what everyone thinks. What is important is that you and your partner agree on what is best for your kid, such as factors like distance, values and diversity.” she advised.